One month in, and the preseason board has aged about how preseason boards age. I had the Texans sixth and the Chargers tenth. They’re a combined 0-8. I had the Raiders 28th and the 49ers 17th, and they’re a combined 7-1. So its time to release the newest tiers, six this time, and the full board is on the power rankings page. Here’s the thinking.
| # | Team | Record | Change |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Kansas City Chiefs | 4-0 | ▲ 2 |
| 2 | Seattle Seahawks | 3-1 | – |
| 3 | San Francisco 49ers | 4-0 | ▲ 14 |
| 4 | Los Angeles Rams | 2-2 | ▼ 3 |
| 5 | Las Vegas Raiders | 3-1 | ▲ 23 |
| 6 | Baltimore Ravens | 3-1 | ▲ 1 |
| 7 | Buffalo Bills | 3-1 | ▼ 2 |
| 8 | Jacksonville Jaguars | 3-1 | ▲ 11 |
| 9 | Chicago Bears | 3-1 | ▲ 2 |
| 10 | Dallas Cowboys | 2-2 | ▼ 2 |
| 11 | Carolina Panthers | 2-2 | ▲ 12 |
| 12 | New England Patriots | 2-2 | – |
| 13 | Cincinnati Bengals | 2-2 | ▲ 1 |
| 14 | Detroit Lions | 2-2 | ▼ 1 |
| 15 | Minnesota Vikings | 4-0 | ▲ 1 |
| 16 | Denver Broncos | 2-2 | ▼ 12 |
| 17 | Atlanta Falcons | 1-2 | ▲ 10 |
| 18 | Pittsburgh Steelers | 2-2 | ▲ 2 |
| 19 | Philadelphia Eagles | 2-2 | ▼ 10 |
| 20 | Indianapolis Colts | 2-2 | ▲ 2 |
| 21 | New Orleans Saints | 1-2 | ▲ 5 |
| 22 | New York Giants | 3-1 | ▲ 3 |
| 23 | New York Jets | 1-3 | ▲ 7 |
| 24 | Washington Commanders | 1-3 | ▼ 3 |
| 25 | Green Bay Packers | 2-2 | ▼ 10 |
| 26 | Houston Texans | 0-4 | ▼ 20 |
| 27 | Cleveland Browns | 3-1 | ▲ 4 |
| 28 | Arizona Cardinals | 1-3 | ▲ 1 |
| 29 | Los Angeles Chargers | 0-4 | ▼ 19 |
| 30 | Tampa Bay Buccaneers | 0-4 | ▼ 12 |
| 31 | Tennessee Titans | 0-4 | ▼ 7 |
| 32 | Miami Dolphins | 0-4 | – |
Records through Sunday of Week 4, Falcons and Saints play Monday night. Change is movement from the preseason edition. The full tiered board is on the power rankings page.
Cream of the Crop
Chiefs, Seahawks, 49ers. Elite coaches, elite talent, and shy of the Seahawks’ hiccup against the Commanders, all three look set for a long season. The Chiefs are 4-0 with the fifth-ranked offense and the ninth-ranked defense, plus-four in turnovers, and Mahomes has nine touchdowns to two picks. The Raiders game was the only one that was close, and they won that one on the road. The 49ers keep just winning games despite the injuries piling up, 4-0 with the best offense in football by the numbers.
Is That MFer Real?
A reference to a meme Kevin Wildes keeps shouting out on the show, and it fits six teams. The Rams and their shaky start, 2-2 with a third-ranked defense and eight giveaways, which is the most in the league. Stafford has six touchdowns and six picks. They beat the Eagles, so they’re not dead, but that’s not what we were told we were getting. The Raiders are 3-1 and took the Chiefs to the brink, 30-27, with the fourth-ranked defense and Kirk Cousins sitting on eleven touchdowns to four picks. I think they’re legit, and I’ve been saying it. The Ravens had a few shaky games, including the home loss to the Saints, before handling the Titans. The Bills started hot and over the last two games have been very shaky and fortunate to be 1-1. The Jags smashed the Pats and then beat the Bengals in Cincinnati. And the Bears, minus Caleb Williams, keep winning. Ben Johnson is making his case for coach of the year, winning different kinds of games with different quarterbacks in each.
Michael Myers
They won’t die. You’re ready to bow out on the Cowboys and they come back against the Texans, 34-30, and send Houston spiraling to 0-4. The Bengals started off faster than normal and now have looked rough for two weeks and started picking up big-time injuries. Panthers, Patriots, Lions, all with mixed results so far. Every one of these teams has a game that made you believe and a game that made you quit.
Chex Mix
This is the rest of the teams that will make the playoffs. Not all of them, obviously, but one or two of these, maybe even three, will end up actually being pretty good and playing in January. The rest, trash. Minnesota is 4-0 on defense alone and I still don’t know what to do with them, which is why they’re here and not above.
Desperate
It’s getting late early for these teams. The Browns have a couple of wins, but unless Deshaun Watson has truly turned back the clock, and I don’t think he has, they’re going to struggle in this upcoming stretch. The Texans at 0-4 have been brutal.
Despair
The trash bag water of the NFL. The Chargers are 0-4 with the 32nd-ranked offense, dead last. Herbert has four touchdowns, six interceptions, has been sacked twelve times, and the team has given the ball away nine times in four games. The Bucs are also 0-4, also nine giveaways, with the offense ranked 31st and the defense ranked sixth, which means the defense is good enough to keep them in every game and the offense bad enough to lose every one of them. All four losses were by a score. Then the Titans, 0-4, 24th on offense and 24th on defense, with Cam Ward at 726 yards, three touchdowns, and two picks through a month. I’d love to put them last, and they deserve it, considering they’re actually trying to field a team and are this bad. At least the thought going into the year was that the Dolphins would be bad. Miami is 0-4 and has scored 46 points in four games, so they’re holding up their end.